What next?

Buying A Computer

Rev. Costello Buys a Computer.

Abbott: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

Costello: Thanks. I'm setting up an office here in my church and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

A: Mac?
C: No, the name's Lou.
A: Your computer?
C: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
A: Mac?
C: I told you, my name's Lou.
A: What about Windows?
C: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
A: Do you want a computer with Windows?
C: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
A: Wallpaper.
C: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
A: Software for Windows?
C: No. On the computer! I need some thing I can use to write sermons, track the church finances. That sort of thing. What do you have?
A: Office.
C: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
A: I just did.
C: You just did what?
A: Recommend something.
C: You recommended something?
A: Yes.
C: For my office?
A: Yes.
C: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
A: Office.
C: Yes, for my office!
A: I recommend Office with Windows.
C: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a sermon. What do I need?
A: Word.
C: I know. I get that from the Bible? John 1. "The Word was made flesh.."
A: No, Word in Office.
C: The only word in office is office.
A: The Word in Office for Windows.
C: Which word in office for windows?
A: The word you get when you click the blue "W".
C: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about church finances? You have anything I can track our givings, our money with?
A: Money.
C: That's right. What do you have?
A: Money.
C: I need money to track my money?
A: It comes bundled with your computer.
C: What's bundled with my computer?
A: Money.
C: Money comes with my computer?
A: Yes. No extra charge.
C: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
A: One copy.
C: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
A: Microsoft gave us a licence to copy Money.
C: They can give you a licence to copy money?
A: Why not? They own it!
(A few days later)
A: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
C: How do I turn my computer off?